Your Best Excuses to Get The Day Off Of Work
Click Here to Add Your Own Excuse!
| Added: November 16, 2007 |
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Name: Trippy
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I work in a Medical office and have to open the place at 5:30 am. well, I overslept that morning (really overslept) and didn't get there until around 10:00 am. Well, the boss shows up at 8:00 am and I can imagine was wondering where I was for all this time. When he asked I replied..." I was here, you know how the copier is out again? Well, I was under the desk trying to fix it. I don't know how you couldn't see me, my legs were sticking out far enough to trip you." He replied," we'll have to call the repair man for that I cant have you under the desk for 4 hours!"
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| Added: November 16, 2007 |
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Name: Gator Aid
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I supervise a group of truck drivers who are paid by the hour. One of their tactics for getting more time is to give excuses for being late returning from a run. Flat tires and mechanical break-downs are too easily documented, so they often come up with excuses such as " there was an accident that closed the highway" or "the bridge at BigTown was open to let a barge pass." My favorite is: "I saw and alligator on the side of the road (we operate in Louisiana), and I stopped to help the game warden capture it."
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| Added: November 16, 2007 |
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Name: Fired
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Actual employees record. Names have been changed to protect the guilty. This was only a few days of a 6 page list for two years of employment. 8/16 Sat. 8:15 Joe called and said he was sick and probably wont be in on Monday because he is so sick today. 8/17 I called Joe's house and His mom said he went out with his friend. 8/18-8/19-8/20 Joe still stayed out sick. 9/6 10:30 Joe called in sick. I asked why he did not call me earlier and he said he was sleeping. 10/13 Monday Joe did not show up at all. 10/18 Sat. Joe asked to show up at 9:00 on Monday 10/20. 10/20 Mon. Joe showed up at 10:30 am. I spoke with him as to why he showed up later than he stated. He had no reason at all for being 1 1/2 hours late. 10/25 Sat. Joe asked to show up at 9:00 on Monday 10/27. I spoke with him in regards to not doing the same thing as the week before and he said that he would be in on time and he was sorry for being late. 10/27 Mon. Joe did not show up so I called him at 3:15 to find out where he was. Joe showed up at 3:30 p.m. with no excuse or remorse for being 6 1/2 hours late.
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| Added: November 16, 2007 |
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Name: Rudolph
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True Story .... A co-worker called in to work 2 hrs. late and said. I can't come to work today, sometime during the night, a reindeer broke it's leg and died, blocking my driveway, so I have to wait for the State Ranger to arrive and perform an investigation and remove the reindeer before I can get my car out of the garage.(this guy actually lives near the N.J. Shore Area). He also called in two weeks later with this one .... (five hours late for work, he called in and said). I'll be late for work today because the train had a flat tire and I had to help change it.
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| Added: November 16, 2007 |
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Name: Pebbles
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I needed a good excuse for missing work, and I have always felt that the more ridiculous (while still believable) the "reason" was the better. This is my favorite. Imagine me on the phone with my boss: I was playing fetch with my dog and the ball took a bad hop and broke a back window. When I went out to check out the damage, I stepped on a big piece of glass and cut my foot really bad. I had to go get stitches, and I don't think I can be on my feet a lot today. The trick to making this excuse stick -- I put a pebble in my shoe for the next couple of work days that I attended to remind me to walk gingerly due to my "stitches." It worked like a charm. Hell, it even got me some good sympathy -- stitches and a dog lover, who can resist that?
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| Added: November 16, 2007 |
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Name: Pussy Problems
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I had missed a lot of work and my boss made me promise I would not be late, but I woke that day to find my cat bleeding. The poor cat had a hole in its belly where an abscess had burst. I called the boss and she said, " Sure it does..." The vet was very accommodating and wrote me an official excuse, and it hung on the boss's bulletin board for a very long time. It read, "Please excuse Sheryl being late to work today. Her cat had a hole in it.
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| Added: November 16, 2007 |
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Name: Chigging Along
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Actually used (and believed) when I was working in Toronto. "You'll never believe it! I said with a straight face, I was heading here with plenty of time to be on time, when my car tires got stuck in the streetcar tracks! Now, I could drive forward and backwards but I couldn't turn off the tracks. I continued. Now I knew I couldn't safely stay there, so I did the only thing I could. I said, I had to drive all the way down to the rail yards and (finally) drive out free at the barns. Just to top it off, I continued, I'm sure you know how far away the rail yards are from work. I took me an extra half hour just to drive back! That's why I was late for work."
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| Added: November 16, 2007 |
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Name: Drawn Together
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A graphic artist I once knew told me of a person who called in and said his house had burned overnight. He was caught in the lie when word got out because co-workers took up a collection and the guy had to come clean when they gave it to him. He said it's just so much easier to say you've got diarrhea. They can't argue with that. (Imodium hadn't been invented yet.)
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| Added: November 16, 2007 |
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Name: Spanky
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Called in on Tuesday I won't be able to come to work for the rest of the week. My shrink put me on a depressant pill yesterday and I was up all night wired. I'm in zombieland right now and I don't want to drive in fear of an accident, or run the machines in fear of getting hurt or dismembered. I need the rest of the week off cause my body needs to adjust to the medication. So I need the last three days as vacation days because I've missed too much time already and I can't afford to miss anymore .
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| Added: November 15, 2007 |
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Name: Arrested
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He could have used this excuse.. I have a bunch of old parking tickets, and if I don't pay them I'm going to be arrested.
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| Added: November 15, 2007 |
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Name: Hahahahaha
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How stupid could this Kevin guy be for posting a pic of himself at a party from the night he was supposed to be working? He should have used this excuse!
I have to help my Aunt Flo in Omaha make cookies. She's much better now and she wants to send thank-you cookies to everyone who came to see her when she thought she was dying.
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| Added: November 15, 2007 |
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Name: Hijacked
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Damn this Kevin Colvin dude sure seems like a dumbass.. maybe he should have told his boss "My bus broke down and was held up by robbers."
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| Added: November 15, 2007 |
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Name: The Dog Did It
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Here is a great one Kevin should have used... "I tripped over my dog and was knocked unconscious."
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| Added: November 15, 2007 |
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Name: skunky
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He should have tried... "I was sprayed by a skunk."
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